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October 6, 2011: The ds106 Rupture

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Be Prepared! October 6, 2011: The ds106 Rupture
cc licensed flickr photo shared by cogdogblog

Digital storytelling expert Happy Camper has analyzed the facts of ds106, and to him the number are clear.

Add the number of user generated assignments plus the bitrate for ds106radio plus the number of blogs publishing to the ds106 website reveal the number 279; the 279th day of the year is October 6– that is, 10/6!

Camper predicts the end of times at 1:06pm on 10/6 when those who have not been blogging ds106 digital stories will perish in earthquakes and upheavals, while the faithful will enjoy the joys of all days, limitless bandwidth, and trippy music in the ether. The Rupture is coming!

To avoid perishing with the faithless, sign up now to be part of ds106 and get posting your animated GIFs, radio shows, mashups, visual stories– and Camper assures that YOU WILL BE SAVED.

“The whole world is under Storytelling Judgment Day and it will continue right up until Oct. 6, 2011 and by that time the whole world will be destroyed,” Camper proclaimed.

What happens if you ignore digital storytelling and spend your time just tweeting your lunch, deleting email, and facebooking your minutiae?

All of the remains of carcasses—the bones–will be thrown out of the grave and the way ds106 describes it, be like dung or manure—because they will be shamed in the eyes of the web as a final of consequence of the wrath of Bava.

Those who are in the area where earthquake has occurred—they will be in horrible torment, because of all the horrible things that have happened. On the other hand, those areas where the earthquake has not come, they will be able to view the horror that is going on where the earthquake has already happened.

For the non-digital storytellers, the moment they die, they will never again have conscious existence (not that they had any to being with). That is something that Mashable and Digg have never taught. They have never understood. They thought Facebook said they would go to some offline hell without wireless or 3G signal and be punished there forever as a result of their sins. The ds106 says that the wages of sin is death, and the word “Hell” is actually a synonym for those who don’t blog.

Save yourself! Get into digital storytelling NOW. THE END IS NEAR!

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