Alright, I’m willing to admit what you all have known since day 1: I am a sick, sick, individual.

And this fandom assignment is the proof of it. It’s even worse than that Einstein video I posted way back when.

Warning: If you’re a Glenn Beck or Kei$ha fan, this post may offend you. If so, I’m not sorry. You need a sense of humor.

Enjoy that? Disturbed? Yeah, I imagined. Truth be told, this is “fandom” only in the loosest sense – I have a very low opinion of Glenn Beck, and I think Kei$ha is a really trashy, untalented singer who gets by solely by skanking and overusing autotune.

But there’s still something I find fascinating about them on the rare occasions when I indulge in either of these bad habits. Glenn Beck’s bizarre, almost religious intensity as he spouts misinformation is as entertaining as it is creepy. (I honestly think people need to focus less on how he’s frequently wrong, and more on how the format of his show is honestly really weird.) Kei$ha’s songs are often really, really catchy, even though they’re pretty much entirely fake, and I’m well aware of that. They’re really just a higher production version of the Friday song.

So why did I put them together? Well, for one thing, I think it works really well as a parody of the creepy fans that Beck seems to have all over the place, as well as just how gross and awkward Kei$ha’s song is. (Never will you be more aware of that than when you have to listen to her sing about sticking her hands down his khaki pants while Glenn Beck stands there. For that mental image, you have my apologies.) Also, it’s 5 AM, and I’m at my most twisted in the early hours before dawn when I’ve had no sleep at all. But I do think this is a sort of fandom — it’s just an ironic, uncomfortable, not entirely sane sort of fandom.

Please let me know if you think I need to be committed. (If you’re just upset because you actually like Glenn Beck – well, I guess you can let me know that too, but that’s not really the point.)