Dear Konrad,

We’ve been partners for a year: I’ve never thanked you for your love and support.  You tolerate me and are privy to my most personal thoughts even though I treat you as a tool.  I only take care of you when you run dry, giving you fuel, like coffee, so that you may continue to serve my purpose.

You are starting to show wear from my use: scars and wrinkles, a testament to stories told and time endured.  You are much more durable than I, will last beyond my years, perhaps to be manipulated by my heirs.

Beauteous Konrad, your physique is unmatched in your peers.  My fellow humans do not all have partners such as yourself, but treat their servants like trash.  Without culture or style, these disposables are an insult to nature.  Konrad, you will never kill a sea turtle or be ingested by hungry aquatic life.  You will always be my right hand.

Your deep blue hue and chrome detailing make me feel that I’m driving an antique convertible.  With you, Konrad, the pleasure stems not from the destination, but the journey.  Every journey you record brilliantly, allowing me to look back on our adventures.

Thank you Konrad Flex, Blue Tortoise Noodler extraodinare, you’re always the piston-fill fountain pen for me!